Don’t Trust Online Strangers Who Act Like “Friends”
In general, folks are too trusting. When online, you should be the polar opposite. Don’t trust anyone or any website until you can verify that they are trustworthy and credible.
This is a difficult task, though. Great-looking websites can be scammers. In addition, social media, groups, and discussion boards contain people whose credibility or sincerity cannot be verified.
Someone you’ve been communicating with who makes you feel that they “get you” could have ulterior motives. Happens all the time.
Refrain From Providing Photos and Personal Information Online
In informal communications through a game message board I frequent, a man I helped in another country with some of the questions he posted replied to me to thank me, and then he asked about my age(!) and for a photo of me.
I said I was glad to help and that I was sixteen. Two days have passed since, and I don’t know how to handle this appropriately. I would feel rather uncomfortable giving out photos. But I feel I have to reply to him rather than let the messages “grow old” and let him assume I am not interested; I don’t care, etc.
Could you please help me out in this situation? I don’t, of course, want you to write the email for me, but some advice to point me in the right direction would be greatly appreciated. Thank you very much for your attention and your time.
I am so glad you wrote me about this critical issue! With more people online and relying on those connections for friendship, things can go south quickly. Stop now and inform your parents about this person.
Do not send him a picture, and do not communicate with him further. Getting questions like that makes me believe his motives are questionable, especially when asked of someone under 18. That could be why you haven’t heard from him. You are underage.
There is no need to know your age or have a picture of you for forum support. Let the emails “grow older” – better yet, delete them and don’t respond at all. You shouldn’t feel you have to reply to everyone who emails you. Primarily, folks, you do not know. This applies to anyone — regardless of age.
Let’s play devil’s advocate…
Why would you be interested? You don’t know this person. These are odd questions that are usually asked only after much longer communication, when time and consistency have built some level of trust.
Since you cannot prove whether they are in another country (or just the next block over from your house), you need to be extremely careful with your trust and information — both online and offline.
You are under no obligation to reply to unasked-for personal questions via private email. In response to future similar requests, let the person know that you do not provide your photo or personal information to strangers.
If they need further assistance with the game, point them back to the forum for support. If they persist, consider reporting them to the forum moderators or local authorities. You just can’t be too careful.
How to Handle Private Messages in Forums
This is how I handle private messages in forums where I offer my help. When I receive private messages for support from folks I don’t know, I reply:
Please post your questions publicly in the appropriate forum. This way any answers you receive can benefit the other members of the Community who may run into the same issues. Thank you! 😉
You cannot trust or believe folks you do not know — no matter how nice or sincere they may seem. So, never give your age or any personal information to anyone online (regardless of your age or their supposed location).
They don’t need to know any of that to discuss games or ideas, or to have conversations with you. If they get upset when you don’t want to provide a photo or more information, that is a sign to delete any future emails and notify your parents, the moderators, and the ISP of the situation.
