“During These Uncertain Times…”
We are living in crazy times. With that comes less patience, more stress, and more folks lashing out. Now is when that extra little effort, respect, and courtesy are what we all need.
With this post, I hope to help everyone consider how their communications can impact others in both positive and, sadly, sometimes harmful ways.
Too many use a presumptuous, informal tone in their emails. They communicate as though they know what the other side means or is thinking, which, in many cases, is invalid.
We need to pay attention to detail in how we address others and use proper grammar and sentence structure to avoid misunderstandings. This is the only way to ensure that your message is relayed as intended.
We need to make sure our tone and intent are super clear. We don’t want to appear unconcerned or disinterested. Those details, when paid attention to, can cause a different response—a positive one.
Yes, with those you know very well, you can probably get away with whipping off emails without proper courtesy or etiquette. You can also be as informal or grumpy as you like (but I bet they wouldn’t mind if you made an effort to be pleasant anyway).
A Little Courtesy Goes a Long Way
A little courtesy can make a massive difference for emails with those you don’t know very well or at all. None of us knows what others are going through or struggling with. So, never assume or surmise.
Whether you are emailing directly or through website inquiry forms, forums, and groups, courtesy and pleasantries are not venue-specific. Courtesy is always something to consider.
Putting forth the effort to add a dash of courtesy and proper communication skills shows you respect the person on the other side. You appear to be someone who should be taken seriously, and understand that email is not a one-way street.
When Times Are Tough
Stressful, difficult, uncertain—every TV commercial reminds us of what we are going through. We get it.
But times like these are when courtesy and respect can make all the difference in the world. In how we communicate and acknowledge what others are going through.
When you email a website with questions or for assistance, and you ramble on without any of the basics or are too informal, your inquiry may not be taken as genuine. If you email with demands or accusations, you risk not receiving a response.
When you don’t take the time to communicate properly and show respect for the other side’s time, why should they take some of their valuable time to respond? Many folks won’t. They have more important things to worry about.
Sadly, I am not responding as much. Believe me, that is not me. When all this email stuff started over 30 years ago, I believed that you should respond to anyone who took the time to email you. Not any more – I am increasingly finding that I don’t have anything constructive to say about the anger sent my way.
Too often, through one of my sites, I get an unhinged email from someone I know is unhappy. It’s not my fault, and I do not take it personally. I feel bad for them because I know life is difficult for many folks.
But there are times when the email is so off the charts that there is nothing I can say. To be sympathetic would seem as though I were humoring them. To explain or try to defend their claims would fall on deaf ears, so I don’t.
When I have no choice but to respond, I communicate with the courtesy and concern they didn’t offer me. And I sincerely wish them the best. Because I mean it, I can’t imagine being so upset and angry that you lash out at strangers.
Set the Tone and Open the Door
Be your best when emailing a group or new contacts who don’t know you well. Reflect humility and kindness. If you cannot relate to what’s being said, sometimes it’s best not to say anything.
The last thing you want to do is leave a negative impression, reflect a lack of sincerity or knowledge about the topic at hand, or make it seem like other people’s experiences and emotions are not valid or understandable.
While similar, everyone’s current experiences are very personal and different. Keep that in mind at all times. Always give the benefit of the doubt.
Let them know they are worth the effort and your concern. Taking the time and showing concern and respect beyond what you need at the moment puts you firmly in a positive light, especially with those who have yet to learn what a great person you are.
