Emailing Group Members You Don’t Know

Groups and discussion lists are great places to share experiences and have conversations with those of like minds. There are certainly times where emailing other group members privately is apropos. For example, if a discussion goes off track and you know it no longer applies to the group as a whole, email the individual who directed the conversation off-topic with your response. You will want to mention that is why you are emailing privately so as to keep the group on topic and of value to all.

When you join a group or discussion list of like minds, it is a given that you may hear from them off-group (or off-list) if the situtation warrants. As always, this is an issue of discretion and not to be abused. For example you would never email group members privately about anything you can commercially gain from unless they specifically ask you to.

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Stop Forwarding Me Emails!

The topic of unwanted forwarded emails is one which I get contacted about almost daily. “Please advise a nice way of asking them to stop forwarding me all those [jokes, political commentary, feel good, chain] e-mails.” Everyone knows a nice way — saying please, thank you, appreciate your understanding type comments will always work.

However, what these folks instinctively know is that by making that request, someone may get hurt feelings. And 9 out of 10 times that is exactly what happens. Habitual forwarders actually think they are being thoughtful when in fact they are reflecting the epitome of lack of consideration for those they send to.

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Friends Forwarding IMs

I was recently asked:

“Is it against email etiquette rules to copy and paste a section of a IM (Instant Message) conversation you have with A to your best friend B? This is not public, nor does B mind. Is this not the same, or at least very similar to explaining the scenario to B?”

Well explaining a conversation you had with another to someone else could be considered gossiping, right? Same goes if you are forwarding another person’s written words or comments without their knowledge. It would be one thing if you asked A if you could share with B and they approved but quite another to intentionally share without their knowledge.

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Some Emailers Simply Don’t Care…

I thought I would share with you an email I received from a site visitor in regard to my Email Etiquette Quiz:

Site Visitor: “In your Netiquette Quiz; QUESTION: 9 in regard to how quickly I should respond to emails you say the correct answer was A: ‘As soon as I can; no longer than 24-48 hours — to not reply promptly gives the perception you don’t care.’

This is the wrong answer!! The proper answer is c. ‘I don’t have to reply’ at all. I WANT the person to perceive that I don’t care! (Name Withheld)”

Wow! I can’t imagine he feels that way about every email, but none-the-less he felt the need to send me the above comment trying to correct me.

Email Etiquette is a set of guidelines for folks to use so that they are perceived as someone who is a pleasure to communicate with. One can ignore every single bit of information on the topic if they so choose.

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