Aplogize if you’re infected!

Should you apologize if you get an e-mail virus that starts sending out to all your friends and contacts?  You bet you should!  There is no excuse in this day and age to get infected in the first place.

First you want to figure out how that was allowed to happen so it does not happen again. Lack of of understanding, software, updates? Whichever it is address it so you won’t you find yourself in this embarrassing situation again.

Then, you may want to send out a simple broadcast apology stating you are sorry for any inconvenience caused and noting that you’ve learned your lesson and have now put software/updates in place to prevent this from happening again.

Keep in mind however, that if your friends have good virus protection, it probably will not be an issue and they may not even notice because the infected e-mail will be quarantined on the download.  See, the only people who have problems with viruses are those who don’t make the effort to protect their own computers which includes constantly updating their virus software.

Make sure you use the built in update scheduler that comes with all virus/spamware software to ensure that your computer is kept informed of the latest new viruses to know what to protect you from.  And you have to have a program that is actively scanning your e-mail too.

The program I use is AVG Internet Security.  After years of using unreliable programs or bloated Norton Systemworks, I’ve seen the light!  This program doesn’t hog resources or require as much drive space to do a much better job!  My system is safe and has been running much smoother since I made the switch!

If you know someone who needs to be made aware of this information, check out my article on the topic. Simply click on the little “Email this to a Friend” button in the top right corner of the page to e-mail them a direct link:

Remaining Virus Free is YOUR Responsibility!

“Dear John” E-mails?

In the past several weeks, several onliners have e-mailed me about getting a “Dear John” e-mail and asking how they should reply. In my opinion, no reply is necessary — get on with your life!  Anyone who would treat you in that manner isn’t worth a another moment or milisecond of your time.  I know that is easier said than done when someone you care about is apparently so limp-wristed to behave in this manner, but I would not justify that type of an e-mail with are response.

One lady explaining that after a decade long relationship, that the Dear John e-mail not only ended things but made the statement to not bother replying or calling.  Fine — I would honor that request. What a cad! And a chicken boy to hide behind his monitor when it comes to something he should have been man enough to talk about in person about!!

Some things are not meant to be communicated by e-mail. Breaking up a relationship is certainly one of them! Not only is it extremely bad manners to send a Dear John e-mail, it is plain old selfish and reflects your lack of character in doing so.  Obviously anyone would be better off without a person in their life who cannot even give them the courtesy of contacting them on the phone or in person about such an important and emotional issue.

I have covered this topic in various articles but will do my best to continue to put folks on notice that sometimes you have to communicate face-to-face or at the very least on the phone in certain circumstances.  Even if it is more difficult — it is simply the right thing to do!

Unfortunately, there will always be those who are lean on character and integrity who will hide behind their screens when it comes to doing what’s right. That in of itself should speak volumes of the type of person they are (and are not!).

If you receive a Dear John e-mail, know you are better off without someone like that in your life. Hold your head high and think of it as though they did you a favor!

Personal Away Message Basics

Some think away messages are only for business — not true. You can certainly have away messages for personal contacts so that folks do not think they are being ignored in your absence.

You just have to make sure, if you do use a personal away message, that you take into consideration the following:

• You have to be careful about using an away message on your general e-mail address if your address is easily attainable.  You don’t want to announce you are on vacation leaving your home empty.  Rather state you’ll be away from the computer for awhile without providing details.
• Today I received 3 away message autoresponders when I sent out my Weekly E-mail Etiquette Tips that were stating the recipient would be back on Monday. Yesterday, August 25th.  Right then and there, write yourself a note, post-it or put it in red letters on your calendar by your computer to take down the autoresponder when you get back. Make this one of the first things that you do upon your return.
• Most importantly, if your e-mail address is subscribed to any discussion mailing lists, unsub before your engage your away message. Otherwise, each time a message is sent from the list, your autoresponder will go out to everyone else who gets posts to the list. You may find that you are unsubbed by the list owner and may even have some unpleasant e-mails waiting for you from other list members upon your return.  This is where having a secondary e-mail address to use just for stuff to sub to is a good idea!
• Create a message that is brief, includes your return date and when folks can expect to hear back from you. This way they don’t think they are being ignored.
• Engage your away message right before you leave to go away and do not intend on responding to any further e-mails until you return.
• Upon your return, make it a priority to respond promptly to waiting messages. You don’t want folks wondering if their messages got lost in the shuffle or make them feel they are not important to you.

New Etiquette Forums!

Over the past 13 years I’ve done a ton of radio, TV and magazine interviews about E-mail Etiquette — the most recent being September’s issue of Real Simple Magazine.

And over the years, I’ve had folks ask me plain old etiquette questions that had nothing to do with e-mail. As time would permit, I would offer my advice and input to receive back gracious e-mails of thanks and appreciation for me taking my time and providing good advice. It seems that in our narcissistic culture, folks have questions about etiquette and common courtesies and for some reason they always land at my doorstep.

I used to have e-mail etiquette only forums several years ago and had no choice but to shut them down because the forums were continually hacked and attacked. There was at the time such a visceral reaction to the concept of e-mail etiquette that it became too much of a downer to continue to deal with — so I took the forums off-line.

To help those looking for answers on every day etiquette issues, 2 years ago I launched my “Everything Etiquette” site called 123 Etiquette. This site was a compilation of my articles and those from other etiquette professionals across the net hoping to give folks a resource that, from what I could tell, was desired and needed.

So today, I took 123 Etiquette one step further and again am taking the risky foray into having to manage, moderate and run a forum by launching my 123 Etiquette Forums. This time, however, its about etiquette of any kinds! From e-mail etiquette to cell phone etiquette, to funeral etiquette and shower etiquette — even family and pet etiquette! If folks have a question about what to do or have a dilemma they want advice on, I’ll be there to offer my POV.

Hopefully over time, this forum can become a community of like-minded people who appreciate that as human beings, courtesy is something that should not be an afterthought.

Why not stop by and register, ask questions or share your experiences in sticky situations on e-mail etiquette or otherwise ? I look toward to seeing you in the forums!

Next Page »